It was just supposed to be a one time thing, posting a naked picture of herself on a social website that has hundreds of other women doing the same thing. Only it very quickly hooked Abby on the high of knowing that others desired her body. Until it’s just one man that has her full attention.
Jack is gorgeous and he wants her and it’s Abby’s worst luck, she believes, that he’s in the same city of Austin. Abby isn’t ready for more than what she can give from behind the safety of her keyboard. But Jack won’t take no for an answer when her body and her moans are telling him yes. Tracking her down Jack is even more enticing in person than from behind the computer and she can’t ignore that her body wants him just as badly as he wants her. Jack won’t give up on her and Abby has to decide if she’s willing to give up the safety of being alone to let Jack in.
“So why don’t you like cops again?”
“Before I answer that you have to tell me how it is you never once mentioned you were a cop. You talked about coworkers and dealing with assholes but nothing you said ever hinted at you being a cop.”
“You’re right and it wasn’t by chance, I’m sorry. Especially, considering just how much it means to you. I guess for the longest time it’s always been something I hold back until I feel comfortable or the person feels comfortable enough with me. With you, I always felt you holding a part of yourself back and that you were skittish and I didn’t want to scare you away. There are many people, not just you who have a preconceived picture in their head and most people, they think cops are dicks. Yes, there are other officers I’ve seen who get off on the power trip of their badge and I’ve seen some do things I wish I hadn’t. So, I can’t say I blame people for the way they think. For me though, that’s not who I am and I would expect people to get that. But for them to feel like they can’t be real with me because I’ll arrest for something stupid, I still can’t understand that.
Then there are some women out there who like the uniform and get off on it. For them, it could be any guy and they’re all over him.
So yeah, it wasn’t by accident and that wasn’t really fair. Again, I’m sorry for holding back on you. I won’t say I regret it because then we wouldn’t be here now. You would have heard it and ran and I might not have been able to catch you.”
His eyes are soft and since he’s right and I feel the same way, I give him a smile to let him know it’s okay. The look of relief on his face makes me feel better. “When I first moved to Austin I had a roommate and she was dating a cop. He was very controlling, he didn’t want to live with her, he needed his own space. Yet, he had a say over who she lived with. I hadn’t changed my name yet and he figured a Senator’s daughter was safe. He was the one who set the no man in the apartment rule and warned me if I was going to be one of those sixth street crawlers I would be out on my ass. He was there a lot and he told her what she could and couldn’t eat, told her when he thought she was getting fat and what she could wear. He didn’t want her wearing make up unless they went out together. It made me ill.
Then there’s Claire, I know I complained once about her to you. Her boyfriend’s also a cop and an asshole, controlling and manipulative. It’s weird, sometimes it seems like he doesn’t even want to be with her but he doesn’t end it.
He reminds me of my father. My father had been a Marine, it seems like all of them, soldiers, cops and anyone with a badge they’re all alike. Controlling, giving orders, and demanding. My father has about pounded out all of who my mother ever was before he met her. She’s what he made her, pretty, empty and a puppet.”
“Is that why you changed your name to your mother’s maiden name, Dixon?”
I nod and thank the waitress for the juice. Remembering the backlash from me changing my last name causes a twist in my lips that some would call a smile, but it isn’t. “He cut me off completely then and I was relieved for it. I haven’t talked to him actually since about a week after he left me at the hospital. He was demanding I come to work for him in DC, it was laughable. He’d pretty much ignored me for the last four years. He was so pissed when he found out I didn’t apply to Ivy League schools. I just wanted to go to the University of Washington in Tacoma. I was afraid to leave my mom alone with him, I think her coming to visit me three or four times a year was the closest thing she got to freedom. Then after that night in the hospital he only referred to me as the whore or slut. Why would he think I would want anything to do with him?”
“Why doesn’t she leave him?” He reaches across the table and takes my hand in his. I had no idea my hand had curled into a fist and have to consciously unfurl it. Stroking the back of my hand his touch is soothing and light.
“It’s something I talk to her about at least once a year, it used to be every time she came to see me in Tacoma. She won’t, she’s too scared. He married her when she was nineteen and he was forty two, did you catch that? I’m assuming you hit up Google?” He nods. “She was just a kid. She didn’t know better. Had no idea what she was getting herself into. He’s got her so brainwashed, she can’t comprehend life without him. What will I do? Who will I be? She asks me, when I try to talk to her. She does the committees and the volunteering but they’re all ones he picked out. I know he’s hit her and hurt her. When she came to visit me in the hospital she tried to tell me not to listen to my father. What would he know about what I had gone through, for him it was a regular Thursday night.”
“Jesus christ.” He exhales as he squeezes my hand lightly.
I have enjoyed reading from a very young age and it wasn't long before the children books bored me and I read the books my mother enjoyed Stephen King and Dean Koontz and I didn't sleep without the light on until I was about ten.
I came across my first Harlequin by accident and it was love at first read, no one died and happy endings? It was a whole new world and I loved it.
I wrote my first story at eight and everyone died, of course. Since then I would like to think I've gotten better and now I'm writing the happily ever afters I first fell in love with, with some hot sex thrown in along the way.
Fiona Murphy is giving away to 3 lucky winners a ebook off her backlist, she is also giving away one $20 Amazon Gift Card to one winner, and one $10 Amazon Gift Card to another lucky winner.
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